A key second principle that allows coaching relationships to be unconditional is that they are purely influence-based. As a coach, you don’t hold a position of authority in your client’s life like a boss, pastor…
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You’ve just started a coaching appointment, and the first thing you discover is that the person sitting across from you didn’t do half of his action steps—for the second week in a row. Do you…
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Coaching works because it is a great relationship built on clear expectations about change. If either the openness in the relationship or the high expectations are eroded, you’ll lose effectiveness. How do you effectively maintain expectations in a coaching relationship?
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The process of habit change is not well understood by Christians, and neither are the relational resources God has given us to do it. The key factor in change is motivation, not information. It isn’t knowing what to do that produces change—it’s having the incentive to tackle the hard work it entails. We have to get motivated, to get energized to change, and then stay motivated and energized long enough to form a new habit.
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Accountability is an effective tool to help a coaching client change habits. And the principles behind accountability will work with any kind of action step. Whenever a client needs to get something done, accountability improves the chances of success. Here’s an overview of how accountability is normally applied in a coaching relationship.
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It’s 11:00 p.m., you just got back from another long day of ministry two time zones away from home, and you’re sitting alone on your hotel bed, exhausted. Tomorrow you fly back home through O’Hare, but right now all you want is to relax for a half an hour or so before bed. As you’re flipping through the channels trying to find ESPN Sports Center, there right in front of your eyes is a graphic, X-rated sex scene…
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Build People, Don’t Solve Problems

As coaches, we can choose to focus on becoming or on doing: on preparing people’s character for eternity or on making sure things are done right today…
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Apologies are important: ever been in a situation where you got really hurt and the other individual wouldn’t even so much as apologize to you? That’s one of the ultimate snubs: you got hurt, but…
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How would you respond today if a potential missionary client asks, “Do YOU have a coach?”

As coaches, our deepest values and beliefs are reflected in our behavior.  We are trained to believe that…
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If you want to help couples learn to help themselves by coaching their own marriage relationship it is essential that they learn to do two things well: 1. To participate in conversations with heart and skill. 2. To observe and adjust their own communication process.
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A client seems to be his own worst enemy. He started well, but ran out of enthusiasm/confidence along the way. The “why” seems weak in the face of the discouraging results or boredom or painful experiences.
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[The articles I post on ChurchCentral are drawn from recent issues of Christian Coaching Magazine and represent a wide array of leaders and coaches as the authors. Thanks for reading! -Jerome]

Ask Profound Questions…Get…
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I don’t feel depressed. I haven’t lost interest in these things. I just don’t do them. I’m excited about the possibility to accomplish my goals and the idea of being an independent woman, but I have trouble acting on it. I don’t have trouble dreaming about the life I want, but I don’t know why I don’t do what it takes to make it happen. What the heck is wrong with me? How do I get that focus and discipline now that I am out of such an oppressive and damaging marriage?
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At a coaches conference a few weeks ago we were doing an exercise about leadership. In answer to the question “How do I see myself?” the keynote, a coach herself said: “fraud.” A room of one hundred coaches sat in stunned silence. Then she asked “who else?” Hands went up all over the room…..including mine.
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Women often find themselves hiding. Ever since Eve chose to eat the apple, mankind has been covering themselves up with the fig leafs. There are a lot of reasons. We mask our shame, fear, insecurity, loneliness, and low self worth. We cover up our true heart desires, convincing ourselves we are silly to want to accomplish something more. We live in a world of make believe instead of the real one we were destined by God to help create.
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