The process of habit change is not well understood by Christians, and neither are the relational resources God has given us to do it. The key factor in change is motivation, not information. It isn’t knowing what to do that produces change—it’s having the incentive to tackle the hard work it entails. We have to get motivated, to get energized to change, and then stay motivated and energized long enough to form a new habit.
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Accountability is an effective tool to help a coaching client change habits. And the principles behind accountability will work with any kind of action step. Whenever a client needs to get something done, accountability improves the chances of success. Here’s an overview of how accountability is normally applied in a coaching relationship.
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It’s 11:00 p.m., you just got back from another long day of ministry two time zones away from home, and you’re sitting alone on your hotel bed, exhausted. Tomorrow you fly back home through O’Hare, but right now all you want is to relax for a half an hour or so before bed. As you’re flipping through the channels trying to find ESPN Sports Center, there right in front of your eyes is a graphic, X-rated sex scene…
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Taking the Long View

Transformational coaching is taking the long view in working with people. Companies that are managed to generate short-term profits ignore research, product development and employee training because they don’t contribute…
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Build People, Don’t Solve Problems

As coaches, we can choose to focus on becoming or on doing: on preparing people’s character for eternity or on making sure things are done right today…
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Listening: Curiosity vs. Diagnosis

“During coach training, my homework was to get feedback on my listening skills…You have to listen while someone talks about something valuable in his or her…
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Great Probing Questions Are Neutral.

“Why did you ever take that job in the first place?”
“Tell me about how you’ve allowed your job to rob you of your personal…
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Asking Powerful Questions:

“The purpose in a man’s mind is like deep waters, but a man of understanding will draw it out.”                                                                  Proverbs 20:5

“The other day my son…
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Apologies are important: ever been in a situation where you got really hurt and the other individual wouldn’t even so much as apologize to you? That’s one of the ultimate snubs: you got hurt, but…
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Paul, one of my first coaching clients, engaged me to help him discover a sense of purpose in his life. Several months into…
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The 18 risk factors for pastors shown below are given with statistics that show where pastors are at today. You may be surprised or even shocked at some of the realities of ministry leadership. But…
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        Because coaches engage people at the growth edges and challenging places in life, they often encounter situations where God is trying to get a leader’s attention and the leader isn’t getting it. Understanding some…
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How much work is too much? Work is labor, to be sure; but if it is sucking the life out of you, something is wrong. Here are some tips for the client who is wondering if s/he is overdoing it…
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Years ago I read a well-known book on the life of King David that really made an impact on me—just not one that I think the author intended! While David is probably my favorite Biblical…
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We’ve all listened and asked questions since we were toddlers. It’s just that most of us have never approached listening and asking as disciplines, to be systematically learned, practiced and refined. There are lots of…
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