It’s the moment of truth that makes every married couple quiver. It happens when they’re asked the question that reveals what they really think, how they really feel, and why they’ve asked you to coach them, “How would you rate your marriage on a scale of 1-10?”
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Whether you’ve been disconnected in your marriage for a few days or a few months, the beginning of a solution is the same; communication. And coaching skills provide the tools you need to do the job of building pleasure back into your relationship.
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When we talk about talking before we have conversations it puts us in a good position to take stock of our mental and emotional reserves to determine if we have enough fuel in the tank to be our best in the way we listen and respond. “Can I serve Jill well right now? Will I be able to turn off the conversation in my head and to table distractions so that I can really hear her thoughts and feelings?
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Listening from a heart of love accomplishes more than any other single coaching skill to convey care, build trust and soothe ruffled feathers. It is how Jill and I strengthen the bond of our marriage, and sometimes it is sufficient to repair it. I can’t count the times that we have effectively managed an emotional and potentially damaging conversation by slowing down to simply
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Married couples are surprised, relieved and inspired when we tell them that their marriage is our client in the Marriage Coaching process. They are surprised because they come expecting a narrow focus on them as individuals. Instead, we elevate the discussion to the level of partnership and team which they find easier and less threatening to talk about.
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What if you were told that you had three months to live unless you received highly effective treatment that could cure you? Would you make time to be cured? Of course! This analogy fits marriage. Many couples are living a recipe for disaster. They don’t create schedules to invest in their marriage. Instead, many other people and activities get their best, and they give leftovers to each other if they give at all.
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Christian Marriage Coaching is the application of Christian Coaching concepts and skills to facilitate growth, healing and change for couples.
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Equity in relationships is built by skillful sharing of honest thoughts and feelings. Notice the accent on skill. This is because skill is imperative to keep things positive and safe…
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