Listening in the Third Way, Kimberly DinsdaleOct 26th, 2009 | By Kimberly Dinsdale | Category: Coaching Women
“Are you listening to this? Really listening?” Luke 8:4, The Message
Three ways of listening:
1.) Agree with listening. This listener is operating from “I already know and I am right.” How lucky for you we agree, I don’t even need to really listen, let’s move on. Recall a time when someone listened to you in this way, nodding his or her head in agreement, do you feel you were listened to?
2.) Disagree with listening. Again, this listener is operating from “I already know and I am right.” Shaking their head no, arms crossed, formulating rebuttal in disagreement, telling why they disagree and why they are right. Would you feel listened to in this situation?
Usually people who listen in these first two ways, aren’t even aware of the way they are listening to people.
Now look at this third way to listen:
3.) Be with listening. This means exactly what it sounds like. Be. Here. Now. In the moment. Be here physically, emotionally, mentally. Truly be with the person you are listening to. How would you like to be listened to in that way?
We can be better listeners when we really want to; it is a matter of our attitude and commitment. Ears to us listening in the third way.